3 thoughts....

So far, in thinking about may last posting's comments, I can think about three things that I may want to talk about on my blog....

1 - A friend took a class recently on how to 'recover' her inner creativity...I oddly have the same book that the class was structured around (good ol' Mom got it for me years ago) and so I started taking a look at it today. I am leafing through it, not necessarily doing all of the 'activities' and mental checklists that it asks me to, etc...but it makes some interesting points about us as creative individuals.... Am I truly letting my creativity come through? Am I allowing day to day things to become blockages and excuses for why I don't make art, for why I don't MAKE TIME to make art? Which leads into my 2nd thought....

2 - Am I actually using all of my potential as a creative person/artist? When I was teaching, I would have said NO - I tended to teach more than make art, but I guess that is creative too, just in a different way. But part of my unhappiness stemmed from the fact that I was NOT letting myself, or rather, MAKING the time to make art and be creative in a was that was fulfilling to me. I feel like I am finally trying to do that now, but am I my own worst skeptic? Am I sabotaging myself already? As I sit here, I always can think of a million other things that need to be done before I can let myself go make art. WHY? Again, this leads to my 3rd and last thought....

3 - The same friend who convinced me to work on this blog told me something else that was very important - I need to make art a PRIORITY in my life. Just like teaching was at one point (and may be again, who knows), just like it is to make dinner or make sure the errands get ran, just like it is to go to the gym, hang out with my fiance and friends, I need to decide what position ART has in my life. Is is going to take over the priority that teaching has held for the last 6 years? I think it should. I am starting grad school for my MFA in the fall and it is going to make a lot of changes to what I accept now as my artistic style, persona, and goals....if I DON'T give art the priority it deserves, then was the heck am I even doing this for? I'll never have really given this thing a healthy chance in that case. I need to put art first, even if it feels selfish (aaah, there's that word again). These types of opportunities don't come along that often. This is my new goal for the year. Whew.

PS - How long can I make these posts? HAHA! When do you get bored.....and not read.....